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The Totem Pole Necktie

Original Photograph by Jeffrey Hunter - copyright 2000

The Low Man On The Totem Pole Wearing a Necktie

I Found this rather tall guy really late one night or early in the morning, which ever, on the way to a trade show somewhere off the I-5 in Oregon, ( most of him is not pictured here - he was at least 40 feet tall ).

I thought how nice the Van Gogh Art Tie Sunflowers would look placed strategically on Woody’s neck. Yeah I gave him a name too, and no I did not leave the tie behind. He was just alongside the road as we needed gasoline, and this lonely guy was standing right in front of the gas station. Crazy enough to spend an hour creating this picture but not stupid crazy enough to leave the tie behind that would have not lasted through the morning without being removed and taken home at no cost. I sell ties; I do not give them away. Certainly I would not give one up unless I felt an extreme sense of providence and most likely not such a nice novelty necktie that I could sell easily.

Now you may think that no one would notice this tie and that no one would dare steal it from "Woody". Trust me on this one - I had to step way back to get this shot and I really wanted to step much further back but then the tie became lost in the composition and insignificant as a statement of ties in art. So in reality this tie is right at eye level and just off the highway in front of gas station and right in the main part of town.

Now add to that this tie illustrates a Van Gogh multi million dollar painting worth so many millions that Vincent Van Gogh is not very well rested in the afterlife. He only sold one person one of his paintings and that was out of sympathy from his brother. So a Van Gogh Fine Art tie in this century when his paintings are worth in neighborhood of a hundred million dollars or so is not going to hang around the neck of a guy like Woody for very long and Woody was not very capable of chasing after anyone daring enough to steal the priceless Van Gogh Painting Sunflowers necktie.

Once at the Irvine Spectrum Center mall where I sold ties for almost 4 years I did have a stupid young man steal a "Dogs Playing Poker" tie - a painting that is not so valuable like a Van Gogh, at least not yet. I did get the "Dogs Playing Poker" tie back. It was very ugly as a tired New Yorker that has to sell ties for 13 hours every day at least had to teach a really stupid California punk, right from wrong. It was New Years Eve and it was getting close to midnight and I was still trying to make a buck, not having fun. I got rather loud and used some four letter French words that are not nice, screaming in his face in a boutique he was trying to hide in. I gave the guy ten seconds to give me back the tie before I would ruin his New Years Eve. I let him go without getting the mall security goons, thinking maybe he got the message. That message was not with pleasant words for sure. The next day I apologized to the employees of the boutique for being the usual or unusual crazy New Yorker who loses his temper and gets very colorful with language.

So now take a look a Woody again. Ya think he can become a threatening New York nut case like I became chasing some punk after a tie. Not; Woody never said a word, he did not object to having to wear a novelty tie, in fact he did nothing at all except stand there in the dark cold night. At least we know that Woody and others like him, probably don't like boring striped ties, for God's sake he is the low main on the totem pole with all those guys to support above him. His style is just right for a novelty tie - he is colorfully made up, face painted at all. I regretted not leaving the tie behind - maybe it would never have been snatched. It sure looked rather nice on Woody, and he became a bit more distinguished and handsome sporting that fine art novelty tie.

Jeffrey Hunter

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